This is not about Jimmy Bondoc's song, but rather Savage Garden's "Crash and Burn." :)
(God's Love Song)
When you feel all alone
And the world has turned its back on you
Give Me a moment please to tame your wild wild heart
I know you feel like the walls are closing in on you
It's hard to find relief and people can be so cold
When darkness is upon your door and you feel like you can't take anymore
Let Me be the One you call
If you jump I'll break your fall
Lift you up and fly away with you into the night
If you need to fall apart
I can mend a broken heart
If you need to crash then crash and burn
You're not alone
When you feel all alone
And a loyal friend is hard to find
You're caught in a one way street
With the monsters in your head
When hopes and dreams are far away and
You feel like you can't face the day
Let Me be the One you call
If you jump I'll break your fall
Lift you up and fly away with you into the night
If you need to fall apart
I can mend a broken heart
If you need to crash then crash and burn
You're not alone
'Cause there has always been heartache and pain
And when it's over you'll breathe again
You'll breathe again
When you feel all alone
And the world has turned its back on you
Give Me a moment please
To tame your wild wild heart
Let Me be the one you call
If you jump I'll break your fall
Lift you up and fly away with you into the night
If you need to fall apart
I can mend a broken heart
If you need to crash then crash and burn
You're not alone
The previous weeks had been difficult for me. I was stressed and restless. But it was also during those times when God reminded me that He is in control.
On Friday, it has been decided that the cluster KT & PD will be moved to January. God knew there's already too much for me to handle this year. He had other plans, and I know His are better.
On Saturday, the Cornerstone went well even without the presence of the Titos and Titas from the North. God was preparing us for bigger responsibilities next year when we would have to implement Cornerstone in our own sector. Also, despite the technical problems we experienced, the MMLA was a success. And I must say that it was all worth it. God said, "put Me first and I will crown your efforts with success." :)
On Sunday, I went to Norzagaray, Bulacan to give a CLP talk. I was alone but I really felt God was with me. I slept during the bus ride from Ortigas to Fairview. He woke me up at SM Fairview where I'm supposed to ride a jeep to Norzagaray. Again, I fell asleep and the next time I opened my eyes, I was already at the jeepney terminal in Norzagaray. Amazing, right? God knew I needed some sleep (I went home at almost 2AM that morning and woke up at 6AM). :) Here's another thing, I was starting to deliver my talk when the parish priest advised us to move to another venue. He had to conduct a baptism seminar at the parish hall (where we are having the CLP) because there was an ongoing renewal of vows at the main church (a couple was celebrating their 25th year together... and I am 25 years old... so?! :D). I was somehow distracted by that incident that I actually forgot the last of the five things I was discussing. Of course, by the grace of God, I was able to remember it just in the nick of time. Good thing my "delaying tactics" worked. :D I left Norzagaray right after the talk because I had to rush to Brookside, Cainta, for the sector's Music Ministry Workshop. I'm thinking of having Chowking Chao Fan but all the food chains in SM Fairview are filled with lines of hungry people. And so I just bought 2 waffles and continued my journey to Brookside. There's a lot more that happened as I travel and as the day went on. Thank God for friends, family, and loved ones who keep me sane and well, inspired. :)
Monday was the climax, if I may say. I was already emotionally and physically stressed. And it has gone way beyond what I could "calmly" handle. When I got home that afternoon, the first thing I did was cry and tell Mama how exhausted I was. "Sobrang parusa 'tong araw na 'to." Those were my exact words. I spoke to God not with words, but with tears. I was confident that He understands and that He listens. I was so tired and drained that I fell asleep. When I woke up, it was already 7PM. I tried to get up and do something productive but I was too weak to do so. And so I slept again. When I woke up, it was already 11PM. I had dinner and went back to sleep.
I woke up yesterday to a gloomy morning. I was at the office when I got a call from Mama informing me that Lola Basing has passed away. At that point I thought I was already numb. Just two weeks ago, Lola Moning died. Last Sunday, Lola Rosa was rushed to the hospital (and she's still there up to now). I was beginning to lose enthusiasm. I was at work but I wasn't really there. God knew I'm already on the verge of breaking down. And so He surprised me with an email from Unisilver Time telling me that I won in their October contest. That somehow brought me back to my senses. When Tita Ana arrived that evening, she informed us of Lola Rosa's true condition. Doctors found two tumors in her liver and the only option was operation. But considering Lola's age, even the doctors say that she could not survive such a sensitive procedure. And so the advice was to just make the rest of Lola's days happy and as comfortable as possible. She has to (strictly) take several pain relievers, otherwise she would easily succumb to the pain. The whole night I talked to God with tears and a lot of questions. (Those who know me well also know how family-oriented I am. Our family is closely-knitted that we're really concerned about one another. And that special bond does not only hold the immediate family members together, but even the extended ones.)
This morning, I heard God's voice clearly speaking, "I wanna be with you. Let Me be the one." I allowed Him to speak further, and this was His message:
"You're facing these problems because I wanna be with you. Remember that I am close to those who are in pain, and now that you're burdened with the things that your family is encountering, I am even closer to you. Stay strong, My child. I am here. Let Me be the one to remind you that you are loved, you are special, and that you will never be abandoned. Let Me be the one to assure you that everything will be alright. Let Me be the one to wipe your tears away. Let Me be the one to comfort you with My warm embrace in this time of distress. You trust Me, right? And I have never failed you. I will never. Remain in Me. I love you, and I'll never let you go."
I know You're in control, Lord. And yes, I trust in You. And I believe, just as You have provided for my GLS needs, You will also provide for our family especially now that we need You the most.
Your love never fails, Lord. Thank You in advance! :) ♥
Comments
Post a Comment